Write a letter to the personality trait you like least, convincing it to shape up or ship out. Be as threatening, theatrical, or thoroughly charming as is necessary to get the job done.
Yeah, it’s me, rudyblues. Dude, listen, we gotta talk. You and I go way back, right? I mean, you and I were buds in college, I couldn’t have stretched four years into five plus without you. And we’ve spent all those years since bouncing from on side-track to another, who could forget that. What a ride! And I think I’ve been pretty tolerant with you for a long time. But lately, you’ve just gone all on steroids or something.
I mean, there’s things you’ve started to keep us from doing things that we should be doing that are half-finished because you’ve started something else to keep us from doing the first thing! Just look around a little here and you’ll see what I’m talking about.
Look, over there, there’s that guitar we were supposed to be fixing. We got the screws out of the tuning head, but then something shiny popped up on the Intertubez and we just ran off and left it. Weeks ago! The screw driver is still sitting on the bench right where we left it. It’s rusted!
Then there’s that start to the world’s next great novel we were supposed to be working on. When was the last time we looked at that? I remember it. We started looking at it and you reached over and clicked on the browser and we never looked back. This has got to stop!
Just now, when we were all set to clean the house, you decided that writing this post was a better idea, so you said “No, let’s turn on the browser and see what’s on the Daily Post today.” So we did. But then you said “Hey, let’s see what we can find out about me on the Intertubez.” So we Googled about you and looked at the images for an hour, and then looked at the memes sites, and two hours later we finally got bored with that and came back here to finish this post.
So, listen, me and the other traits have been talking, and we all agree that, although many of the pursuits you’ve started us on are highly creative, we would all appreciate it if you toned it down a little. Let us get some things finished. Then maybe we can indulge a little more later. Otherwise, we’re probably gonna have to ask you to leave.
OK, so let’s just finish this post and get outta here, alright? What’s that? Well, maybe we could look at the Reader for a little while. Ten more minutes isn’t going to kill us.